smashdad wrote:

It is never too early to start telling your little girl that she's beautiful and there is absolutely no limit to how many times a day you should say it.  She is growing up in a fucking brutal world and by the time she hits 6, 7 & 8 the world around her will already be telling her the opposite and, staggering as it is to imagine, she'll find herself beginning to wonder who's right, Daddy or the rest of the world.  The media and the little bitches in the playground (often including the mothers) will be relentless so you should be too 'cos by the time she hits 13, 14 & 15 you need to have banked a huge surplus of "my beautiful little princess" type comments 'cos the rest of her little world will be draining them from her.

I think your heart is in the right place but by focussing on her appearance you are embedding the gender bias their generation should be evolving beyond.

Do a first aid course or refresher. Did one centred on the top 10 nightmare scenarios kids get into and glad I did.

If you think they might be fucking with you they almost certainly are.

dutchy101 wrote:

Every word. And often twice or 3 times to make sure I've picked up on every gem within the post.

I believe that's what Jim Jones' followers used to do as well.


the suns page 3 coming to an end.

looking forward to the guardians page three, where harriet harman sets up a task force based on the bottom inspectors in 'viz' .
The names of any male who have coverted the female form will be printed via harriets stasi informers and then sent to a LGBT khmer rouge style re education camp where wilf the d day war veteran can be deprogrammed into thinking he is the stockwell strangler and rapist of women rather than a hero for taking out a nazi machine gun nest with a kumquat.

a splinter faction from the evening standard may wish to print graphic FGM pictures as a banner with cara deelvinge and 6 year old nobel peace prize winner, malala, riding a chariot ben hur style cutting a bloody swathe through white working class males minding their own fkng business on building sites who are getting on with the fucking job at hand while these left wing cnts are still in bed sleeping off a night choosing the top layers of dairy milk delights at barnados.

Edward the confessor,
sun and daily mail reader
salt tank connoisseur
ukip party member
white, working class and owner of an average sized penis
behind the white van
north chingford.

Does everyone read these posts word for word or do you just scan and get the gist of it?


(87 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

dogmanstar888 wrote:

The men of today have never been so well groomed, barnets in particular seemingly of huge importance to a mans self-esteem and well-being.

Anybody else sporting a razor sharp look like below?

He has me for height (just) but that's what I am sporting right at this minute.  No greys, full lush head of hair.  Life couldn't be better.


(17 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

dogmanstar888 wrote:

Seth Troxler doesn't come across badly at all, but the club owner does when the Manc clearly just wants to know if there's a big queue and he starts referring them to websites and Facebook event pages, what a prick ...

If I owned a successful club I'd be an absolute prick to anyone wanting to get in.  I'd be battered beyond belief daily as well.

I love how easily you ate it up.  And how excited you got to use your new "ammo".  What a Muppet.

Double your imaginary record store sales assistant salary.

In Monrovia it is legal to do anything as long as all involved have signed written contracts and are over 18.


(109 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

millsy23 wrote:

Sawalha taking fucking liberties! One does not simply 'pop in' to Pizza Express

She had a short exchange with a gentleman in a pink Nickelson polo and was on her way in under a minute.


(109 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

Julia Sawalha asked me to watch her Pomeranian for a sec while she ducked into PizzaExpress.


(109 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

I enquired about the signed picture of Ronnie Corbett in my aromatherapists waiting room. Turns out he sees the kinesiologist in the adjoining treatment room once a quarter. He'd been the previous week.


(109 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

Leo McKern took a tumble in Tescos, busting his bag of oranges.  I stopped one from rolling out the door with my instep.  He didn't acknowledge me.

1. DJ - Betoko
2. Producer - Starkid
3. Film - The Interview

Mine will be vinyl only and done in one take.  Could be horrific.


(12 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

Never done it but not sure why.  Such a fun sounding name.

dairy lee wrote:

Hang on a min, Hannu and so called Mystery Mod. You stated in the Dermo thread that him and flares are both banned yet Ncable (flares) is still actively taking part on the board.You don't help yourself do you with your double standards. Its hardly a surprise you're criticised for being useless at moderating when you basically struggle in doing the most basic of jobs. Ncable told everyone he was flares in the thread titled Phil Hughes in post 15

Im not saying who i am because i don't want hounding by some mental case like flares forever and a day but if you are going to do a job at least do it properly. i.e ban both of them or let them both back. Because at he moment its looking like you've just got an agenda against Derms.

Just in case your powers of moderation missed it -

Big Fella wrote:  Hasn't taken long before Flares showed his true colours
despite trying to create redic back stories about having five kids, getting
married at xmas etc.

Grant wrote : Too easy.

Ncable wrote:


I made it easy for you pair of fuckwits because I was getting bored with the
board. Honestly, where's the energy gone? It's like the prog version of
Mumsnet around here.

As for the back stories BF, I never stated I was getting married on
Christmas Day, I said I was proposing, which I still am. And there are
children involved pal, all of whom love me very much. Aaaaaah, bless.

ETC, I'm living about 10 minutes from you in Walthamstow mate, if you get
this before the ban wand caves my head in for the 19th time, drop me a PM.

Ta ta.

Excellent detective work this.  Pressure right back on Hannu and BMM.  Tense.

As much as I hate everything about this and the two uber cunts behind it, I would like to eat there. … -show-d33p


(11 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

I miss his lies.

Was this good?  I can't remember ever playing it properly:

Lunch at the in-laws followed by a board game.  Last year was a new low:

I'm in charge of picking the game this year so I'm thinking:

My assistant manages my appointment book so you'll have to ask her.

Nothing to do with my gift or this thread but as a complete aside, my favourite user name is "trancenothanks".