It's like the Alan Partridge episode where he doesn't get his second series then has to fire all his staff.
I'm just catching up.
Fortunately, you've got your Porsche runners on.
7/8 am finishes are much better, just chill out in the club for the last two hours if you need to then get on the first train back home in the morning.
Looks good. Will be buying.
That Celeda track is 10 years old Yant.
Keep the relationship strong, do what ETC says. I have been living through him since our paths crossed. Subseqant to this I have lost my job, blown all my dough on gak and bought a fish tank. Other than that things are better than ever.
is that before or after you go on a week long sex tour of SE Asia Dave?
The ways of romance take many forms, Mills.
Or get over your aversion to 'paying for it' (many blokes do because not because they need to, but so they can walk away hassle-free afterwards) and just bang the shit out of some nasty fresh off the boat Thai in a Hamburg boudoir.
So we've determined Bazza is a squaddie.
Baz, no offence mate, maybe you need to get in touch with your sensitive side.
Cook her a nice dinner, do some shit she wants to do like a nice walk in the hills together then watch a horrific romantic comedy, gently caress her erogeneous zones as you curl up with her. Read her some poetry or something? It's not gay if it's with a woman, don't worry.
Good to stay near Brighton too at this time of year.
Yeah, it looks like it too. Is God smiting Brighton today for being gay?
Nothing better than shunting them from one end of the bed to the other while they look skywards and wonder if they set the video for Midsummer Murders.
Oh my God! It's the DTEN4000!
I'm just joking Baz, standard 'Bedrock board' bantz.
Hope you sort her out.
You talk a big game Bazza.
Sounds to me like the talk of a man who deep-down knows his wife prefers more capable men.
Riveting stuff lads.
F1 and golf are not sports.
Just driving. And more driving.
Good for you Matt.
Now i have met someone new and its like being awoken from a coma, i have realised that it wasnt my fault and that it was just that relationship wasnt the right one, i feel totally different now and meeting someone who really gets me and likes me for me has given me a whole new outlook.
Also, this ^ is like reading something from Woman's Own. Boo fucking hoo. Why don't you go and take a no-make-up selfie?
Bottom line is this, shes not going to change, thats how she likes sex and if you dont like it that way then you going to have to find someone that likes it the way you do
And this ^ is nonsense.
Was this woman of 12 years H Just H?
All of us over on GU could have told you she was a mentaller. After 2 posts.
Sounds to me like she's playing away from home. Have you ever tried poking the other hole and getting your brown wings?
The more I read from this character the more I think Alias The Jester has it spot on.
From the MattBlack 'joke book' that.
Yeah, sheer misery that pal.
Personally, I love giving head so don't mind doing "more than my share" in that dept. but would never stand for that. Must be shite for blokes who just see it as a chore.
Find some way of going to an Asian country (I recommend China or Vietnam, others might suggest Thailand) once a year for whatever reason you can (mates holiday - if your missus is alright with that - some are as it entitles them to a holiday 'with the girls') or preferably 'on business' (I don't know what you do but I am sure there is a conference or trade fair in Shanghai or Guangzhou or somewhere that you might have cause to visit). If you prefer the old 'Turkish delight' then you can always head to Africa or the Caribbean, I expect.
Secretly brush up on the language, so you can be a skilled negotiator when you get there.
Find out the market prices in the place you're planning on mongering in.
Stuff a load of (by British standards) small change into your pocket and go mental for a week. Don't forget to bag up - you don't want to be coming home with the clap.
Return to your happy home for 51 weeks.
Repeat ad infinitum.
Fortunately, the treads on the soles of them Porsche trabbs will never wear down from the extra bit of walking you now need to do.
Of course, if you did drop a pork pie from a helicopter onto an Iraqi you could call him 'Hamed'.
A double strike and you could call him 'Mohamed'.