Fucking Smallman straggling out of the restaurant, white Converse with looped laces trailing across the floor, a botched array of ironic slogan t-shirt and red chinos with whimsical detailing, talking loudly on his mobile to some other Clapham bastard about the Chelsea game, if I were the maitre d' I'd send him on his way with a punch in the fucking Gregory.

I bet they really enjoyed having you too, Smalls, you fucking brass-necked nouveau spasticunt.

Ordering a 'full English' but with a special request for broccoli instead of bacon and grilled mushrooms, and leaving a screwed-up napkin on the table and less than 10% tip in shrapnel.

You bollockhead.

3

(2,994 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

Lovely Mono, I'll pick you up a belt from here next time I'm in China...

http://www.avalanche06.fr/upload-2kar0mg477.jpg

Evening Smalls, how are things in that absolute banterchasm you call a brain?

smallman1 wrote:

Should have signed JT.

Wrong type of defender for the gegenpress. No pace, too old.

Again, you're an absolute clownshoe.

BTW I know Sakho failed a drugs test, but then seemed to be back in the squad, until Klopp fucked him off in that pre season training camp/tour thingy last year.

Moreno is terrible, but I think Sakho is decent and could play left-back and centre back.

Dunno what went on to get him totally fucked off by Klopp, he's better than Lovren.

That second Watford goal today was horrifying. Defenders don't spot or know how to pick up a man in the box and Mignolet is utter wank and just needs binning off. He's inherited some right shite IMO, at the back.

I'm sure Klopp's Dortmund sides weren't this shite at the back, he made players like Hummels (a Bayern cast-off) into world class defenders.

9

(39,719 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

smallman1 wrote:

From Rio De Janeiro to Toxteth.

Horrific.

Rio de Janeiro 35.7 homicides per 100,000

Britain's worst homicide rates per 100,000 (2015 figures)...
Boston 15.0
City of London 12.4
Gloucester 8.0
Blackpool 7.8
Lincoln 7.3
Manchester 6.3
Salford 6.2
Rochdale 6.1
Hackney 5.7
Amber Valley 5.6
Liverpool not even top 10.

Can't imagine it was that horrific, given Coutinho grew up in a hillside favela.

10

(33 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

Wally wrote:

My plan is to pimp Presto out while we're there to make some money.

Those Germans are well into their sick depraved shit so a gimp of Prestos quality should make a tidy packet.

Mods, please can you give a warning to Wally or stick NSFW on this thread, I can't believe he posts such stuff when some of us may have people looking over our shoulders at our computer screens.

I wonder how much of the Loop fund has been misappropriated for this smarmy Clapham bastard to spend on restaurants and his season ticket? I reckon all of it.

shaunstrudwick wrote:

Suarez was the only one i can think of that left due to ambition

Torres.

Coutinho's just signed a new deal so there's no way he's going for that amount when Barcelona have just banked £198 mill from the Neymar sale.

I reckon Liverpool will hold out for about £150 million, then let him go.

Sam Allardyce is a boss manager if you like to tread water around 12th season after season.

We already had Hodgson for that. Same ilk.

Smalls, you're an absolute clownshoe.

After about a month of Conte at Chelsea you said he should be got rid of.

Why would Antonio Conte have left Juventus for Liverpool when we didn't have Champions League football or a bottomless pit of money?

Dickhead.

smallman1 wrote:

At what point do Liverpool fans realise that Klopp is an absolute sham and that the best place for him is the exit door?

LOL, Smalls you really know absolutely fuck all.

Who else could Liverpool realistically recruit who would have got us into a Champions League spot in their first full season?

Hang on, isn't it usually 'You've only got one decent player (Mane or Coutinho depending who you talk to)' from non-Liverpool fans?

Make your fucking mind up.

19

(39,719 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

fadass wrote:

Old Levy must have been off on holidays when modric left though. He usually gets twice the price it starts at.

Blatant anti-semitism.

20

(25 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

millsy23 wrote:

avoiding London like the plague for the next few weeks thanks to Waterloo refurb. The Whistlestop will see its train beer profits nosedive!

Don't they usually terminate most trains at Clapham Junction when Waterloo is blocked?

Spiffing opportunity to go and see Ed for some Common beers!

21

(25 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

'Ed, can you just go to the supplies room and ask for a long stand please?'

Been to any restaurants called things like 'Cargo Bay' or 'Shipping Lane' recently, Smalls?

You unrelenting pest.

23

(39,719 replies, posted in General Bedrock Discussion)

lol at Grant, surely there's tons of 'Dave's Bars' in the Phillippines, run by fat cunt sexpat Yorkshiremen with their Pinoy wives, Sheffield Wednesday shirts all over the ceiling above the pool tables, no?

Uniqlo vending machines coming to the street outside Abdul's Exchange and Mart soon...
http://www.esquire.com/style/mens-fashi … cialflowTW

No word on whether XXXL sizes or elasticated trousers will be available.

Homegrove wrote:

I'd say it certainly is seminal.

In that it's got the spunk of many bedroom djs all over it, yes it is.